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But you said no new hardware until next year? Also a "bloggy" post about friends. Or a lack thereof.

Oh yeah. Well obviously I lied, didn't I? Basically everything I say is bullshit anyway. I just go where the wind takes me. Me and my mum, it's us against the world and I don't need anyone else in my life. The RTX 2060 Super is awesome and I love it. ~

Mum's the only exception to my new rule "don't let anyone close" - and you can't be hurt by them. Some friendships were short, one was very long, but all ended up the same way. Human beings are complicated creatures that confuse and scare me, they are un-predicatable, and if I'm any evidence of this: They can be broken in some twisted ways.

This has happened before. But this one dragged on because I truly felt I had something with this person. How wrong I was. Completely, and utterly, wrong. I don't know what happened, I don't know what I did wrong, communication broken down and I can't, I won't, accept being treated like shit. So I cut them loose for the last and final time.

Sure I have online friends, and some really nice friends at that, everyone who applied for my "friendship application form", I really enjoy chatting to online and there's that, but, no one's getting close anymore.

If life's taught me one thing these last 15 years, it's that my heart is too fragile and too valuable to me, to trust anyone other than my own mother with it.


Sash gets Ray Tracing (finally).

So I bought the GeForce RTX 2060 Super. I didn't really intend to buy new hardware this year, but given the circumstances, I think I just wanted to get something cool to test and make videos with.

I haven't actually tried the RTX yet, I've just played Warframe and that's basically it so far. I made a video of my thoughts on the card and why I got this one in a stupid video I posted yesterday. So I guess you can go watch that if you want. Don't forget to "dislike" it! There's still a tiny scrap of self-confidence left that needs to be stamped out :)

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